Tuesday: 3-6-01 ~ hibernation

I'm not quite sure what it is but I've been hibernating since Saturday nite. I'm only awake long enough to grab food, go to class, then I'm back home sound asleep. It's realy quite odd.

Somehow I managed to finish my piece in jewelry class ontime. It'll be in a display case on campus for a while, but after that I'll get pictures of it and upload them so those of you interested can take a gander at them.

Clone-chan I have an autographed edition of Gaiman's and Amano's collaboration for DC's Sandman comic series. Autographed by both of them. *SMIRKS* It seems that yet again, the clone factor has struck in what we like. ^_^ Sadly, I think I should just give up on your first package to me. It's been what... 8 months now? It should have showed up no later than 5 months ago... someone along the way must have filched the package... It sucks I like loot, and I don't even know what I was getting! *Sighs* So if you have any recourse it's time to go kick-booty at the post office.

The only good thing about this past weekend... my roomie took me grocery shopping and at the grocery store I bought me some Tulips. (Tulips, Irises, and Lilies are my favorite flowers, but Tulips you can only really get from late February into April). They certainly brighten up the kitchen and just leave me full of fond memories. But what was even better than Tulips... there were Girl Scouts selling their to die for cookies. *bounces around the walls* You think with all the sugar I've digested I wouldn't be hibernating so much, huh?

Wednesday: 2-28-01 ~ F****** Night >_<

I've been in the god-damn, annoying, mother-f******ly frustrating metals lab all-shitty day long (re: 7 ass-long hours). I worked for hours with things actually working right... and then as I near the completion of my choker and matching earring set of silver and amber... everything F****** goes wrong. *ARGH*

My bezel cup for my stone setting melted into my earring, 9 hours of work going down the drain in less than 1 second. My choker which has taken me a combined 20 plus hours of work (layered: bezel cup/stone setting, on top of a flower, on top of ivy, on top of leaves, soldered to rings for the necklace chain) got chewed up by the drill bit as it ripped my solder seam apart, and burred up the central point of the choker beyond recognition.

I could just cry. But I feel too shitty to do so. My hands are raw, my back hurts, my chest hurts, my head hurts, and I'm hungry and there no food that takes less than 30 minutes to cook in the whole damn house because almost all of my groceries went bad when we lost power for over 8 hours on Saturday.

I still have hours work of reading before me too and a paper tonite. Yeah this Ash Wednesday sure was a holy day, I got reamed several bloody new ones. -_-

Tuesday: 2-27-01 ~ dinnertime among the rain

I'm so sick and tired of this blasted cough. Yes the bronchitis is back in full force, I'm running a fever, and I got a new series of drugs from the doc. When will this hell end?

To make matters worse, Yahoo Mail is being screwey and I can't read or delete or reply to most of my messages. *ARGH*

Friday: 2-23-01 ~ Yoda-Time

Dr Demento excerpts: Best of advice I dispense from years of Jedi teaching experience, Yes. This advice I dispense, Now. Enjoy the power and beauty of the force. Understand the force you will not until you have used it. Fabulous is how you look, fat as Jabba the Hut you are not. Worry not about the darkside, worrying is as effective as trying to stick C-3PO together with bubblegum. Do one thing every day that will scare even Darth Maul. Yes. Wookies shed all over the furniture they will...

*snerks* Wise words of advice I think. God I love the little green dude. ^__^ And thank heavens it's Friday!

Snow: Get a pita!

Clone-chan: Da... miss you, talk to me. And yes I quickdotted you, but how come you no quickdot me. *sniffs*

Heart-sib: just remember it's the littlest things that can mean the most. Remember we bear the touch of the divine in our lives daily.



Thursday: 2-22-01 ~ nearing midnight

It's been a long day. I feel so incredibly bone-weary. Somehow I managed to trudge through and write the required papers for my American Cultural Studies class. Recently we covered Popular Music, and Pleasures. I have a feeling I may be doing as my seminar paper (min. 20 pages) a study on the culture around Yaoi fandom, tying in many of the studies and insights brought forth in the various Pleasures essays I read.

Scary thought when my anime obsession becomes the means for scholarly research, isn't it?



Wednesday: 2-21-01 ~ bloody frustrating afternoon

ugh... I hate soldering.

I hate working on things smaller than the size of the fingernail on my pinky...

I hate it cause my hands cramp. I saw and sand my fingers more than the piece I'm working on. -_- In order to get the solder to flow I have to anneal the metal with such a high amount of concentrated heat that I run the danger of it beading up into a molten ball... (and that does happen >_<).

I hate it. I HATE it. *I HATE IT*

I especially hate the designing. I have redeisnged my current project over 4 times. Luckily, I've been struggling so with the stone setting (step-bezel with backing, or a bezel-cup setting) that I havne't had to scrap any of the work yet. The original plan was for a pair of small barettes, then one large hair clip, then a choker with a ribbon tie, and now the current version a choker with matching earrings.

I'm using circular semispheres of amber (varying sizes) and varying gauges of fine silver. The largest amber stone will be set and placed in a 3-dimensional flower, backed with textured leaves and ivy. The necklace will appear to look like coiling ivy. I have jump rings (aka o-rings) in the back so that the choker is adjustable. The clasp will be a basic toggle. At the end of the jump rings, I'll have a small amber stone set to dangle attractively down the back of the neck. The earrings will dangle from french hooks into flowers cupping their amber stones, which are medium in size compared to the aforementioned stones.

The thing about my metals class, is either everything works like a dream, or Murphy's law strikes in multiplicity. Usually, I am screwed quite royaly by Murphy's Law. *SIGH*

Tuesday: 2-20-01 ~ dinnertime

Many of you have been asking me, what exactly does my Semiotics class entail? So... here's the hellish paper I had to write over Russian Culture semiotics theory. Now, you too shall know my pain....

Juri Lotman and Boris Uspensky are concerned with the correlating relationship between language and a work, when language is considered a sign system. Through the examination of the content of a sign a structural value can be obtained which helps to place the sign in the system. The system that Lotman and Uspensky are speaking of is culture. Culture is understood as a system that stands between man (as a social unit) and the reality surrounding him. Specifically what is most important when considering a culture system is the means by which man processes and organizes the information that comes to him from the outside world. Information from the outside world may or may not be significant in varying cultures. Reality is perceived as a work or text that must be decoded within the culture. The ability to decode, analyze, and write future texts is what constitutes a semiosphere of the culture system.

The two main divisions of the culture system are found in the relationship between man and the world, as well as the individual and the social collective. The importance of culture lies not in the sum of separate languages, but rather in the inter-relationships of the languages. The polarity of these viewpoints allow for a multiplicity of relationships to be derived. Another level to this polarity of the culture system is the understanding that changes in a culture system come about from the need for self-description on three interconnecting levels: the culture, a social group within a culture, and an individual within a culture. When these three levels of understanding are overlayed with the polarity of comparison and contrast found within the culture system a variety of meanings and interpretations found in the semiosphere of culture can be decoded, analyzed, and a new form derived for the future.

*blah, blah, blah*

Tuesday: 2-20-01 ~ bedtime, 3am

It was a good day. My bed was snuggly and comfortable and I awoke with a smile (which is a *RARITY*). Jennifer Wand finished her *WONDERFUL* 10-part Hana Yori Dango Fic (check out the HYDML if interested, link on sidebar), and Krista Perry posted the next part to her so addictively good Detective Boy Conan Fic. (again link to conan ML on side). They're writing is descriptive and *ALIVE*. The events and reactions feel so very real for their respective characters and stories. The writing is simply put artistry in text.

If only my Shakespeare class were half this interesting. If only I had this much interest in writing my Russian Semiotics paper due tomorrow. *SIGHS* My work is never done, and in the words of Frost "I have miles to go before I sleep."

Monday: 2-19-01 ~ nite owl hours

*MWAHAHAHHA* I have perpetuated the evil of the pita. I got my Heart-sib addicted onto the wonders of the pita. I helped design her pita for her since she knows only extremely basic html. The site fits her. There is a hot sultry Nakago reclining at his ease, image courtesy of Yanwen (her art is simply eloquent in it's breathtaking simplicity). Tamyris *LOVES* the out for world domination type. It makes her all puddly. I have to admit, even I really like the layout of her site (and I'm not bragging here). I have quite a fondness for *BLUE*, and is that site BLUE!

Somehow I suffered through Shakespeare's Richard III. Was it ever long-winded. Finally I manage to complete the tedious text and I start doing my reader response questions for my class, only to be completely stumped by the sheer idiocy of my instructor. 1/3 of the grade was about commenting on whether we agreed or did not agree with the phrase corruptio optimi pessima in how it pertained to the character of Richard III. You guess it, not a single translation note to be had. Obviously it's Latin, but I still couldn't get a translation. I had to call long distance a friend who took Latin, and even she couldn't get a direct translation. We finally settled for the educated guess of a translation: "the aristocracy corrupts most of all."

NOW for graduate students it is necessary for us to prove that we are proficient in at least one other language besides English. BUT never is it assumed anywhere it's Latin. Heck the languages I can translate (Spanish, French, Portuguese, and bits and pieces from other languages) are by no means considered standard in the graduate department. I seriously just think my teacher is just cruel.

Sometimes I think it's really weird what thoughts just spring to my mind. It's like I come home and the second i walk through the doors it feels as if the world has been taken from my shoulders. As I move from the doorway, walk through my apartment to my bedroom, another weight is removed. My apartment is my sanctuary, my room even more so. I decorate in not just some aesthetically appeasing style but in a manner which makes me comfortable. i surround myself with things that I find beautiful, inspirational, reminds me of where I've been and the goals I plan to achieve. My place has a heavy oriental influence, but tucked here and there are Tsalgi-made artifacts (Cherokee), Egyptian, Greek, and Chinese statuary. My room can be cause for pleasant distraction, but it's also a place I reflect. I place around me things that are representative to my family roots. I have a Chichiri shrine (yes i really do have one) tucked away in the corner. it's not that I worship Chichiri as some deity, but it's sorta... a reminder to myself that my prince is out there somewhere and that I shouldn't settle for less then my true partner. I have a beautiful print that depicts the story of Isis and Osiris it reminds me to persevere despite adversity. I have this great picture of Odin (courtesy of Freya Aswynn (author on a good book which gives the history behind the runes) who gave me permission to use the image in my Thesis presentation (and sent it to me overseas in the mail). I look at it, and it strikes me as "storyteller." As I waded through and struggled and bleed over my thesis i'd look up for inspiration, and the gnarled looking figure of Odin as if he's at some gathering about to open his word any minute and tell a story... captivated and motivated me through some of my worst difficulties with my thesis.

I take inspiration in many things some of which are only symbolically important... but they all bring a great measure of comfort in times that prove difficult. My inspiration and my sanctuary are one in the same.



Sunday: 2-18-01 ~ before dawn

Ugh... I've been sleeping only to wake up and go back to sleep. I must be in hibernation mode. I woke up at 4 in the morning... and was hungry so I watched this anime called Gasaraki as I fixed some munchies. It's weird... I think the only reason I watch the sucker is to find out where the heck it's going. But I'm really struck by the poetic quality of the lyrics to the closing song. It comes off like some religious hymn, a prayer, a request and it just seems very, very beautiful.

...Izayo - Hark...
...Izayuukan- It's time I journey...
...Kowashite, watashi no kokoro wo - Break apart my heart...
...Akai kanashimiga - For crimson sadness...
...Afurete, nagarete kuru kara - Pours out from it...
...Imawa tada aa - I can only, oh...
...Hitomi toji aa - Close my eyes, oh...
...Kudakete shimaitaino - I pray, let this break apart...
...Sobani itene - I beg you be by my side.

It also seems very, very fitting to me personally and where I am on my spiritual journey as of late.

Saturday: 2-17-01 ~ the thirteenth hour...

DA! I'm so happy my Clone-chan has noticed me and my pita. YEAH! I always like hearing from my Clone-chan, it always brings a big smile to my face. She's like caffeine, you have to have more ^_^.

In fact, Clone-chan and also my Heart-sib the evil Master of the World (TM) I'm sticking off a little side-bar column on this pita devoted just to little comments to you two special peeps. ^_^ See take a gander by looking down.... then off to the right na no da.

I'm also a most contented WMC tonite because I went to the grocery store and stocked up on post Valentine's day chocolates. Never underestimate the allure of a *BIG* box of chocolates for half off or less! It's not that I'm a chocoholic like many of my friends... or even someone who really just loves chocolates. But a good piece of sugar is always good. Although technically I prefer caramels. I always go straight to the caramels in any box of chocolates. They're usually small squares of milk chocolate. For some reason I hardly ever find them in dark chocolate... Chocolates are nice though.

I remember reading somewhere that eating chocolate produces a chemical reaction in the body that is 1/16 of the chemical reaction the body processes when it achieves a sexual orgasm. No, this doens't mean that if you eat 16 pieces of chocolate you have an unexpected bonus ^_~ But it in my opinion explains why so many people out there *LOVE* chocolate.

I still prefer strawberries or caramels to any piece of chocolate. And when given the choice I'll go for a confectionary without the chocolate (Unless it has raisins... ewwwwww). My biggest weaknesses outside of caramels, are coffee flavored ice cream, key lime pie, and lemon meringue pie. Hmmmmmmm sugar.......

*licks her lips and sighs dreamily*

I hope this doesn't mean I have visions of sugarplum's dancing in my head tonite, it might be threatening to snow here but it's a bit too late in the year for Mr. Bowl-full-o-jelly.

Friday: 2-16-01 ~ rain-smeared evening

ARGH!!!!!!!!

*wmc pulls her hair out in big clumps*

I haven't been this frustrated in *SO* long with anything I've -attempted- to write! Here I was happily typing along with the next installment of "The Telling Price," only to hack this, rewrite that... and when I'm *FINALLY* done with it all I realize I inadvertingly missed several planned story elements and had advanced my fic forwards by far too many parts that it ruined what I had written of it in the past. So part 5 is now utterly and completely on the cutting room floor, for computer folks that means buried in the recycling bin somewhere.

Ugh, Ugh, Ugh.

I'm struggling most with the relationship between Rei and Nokoru, as well as dealing with Rei's mystery...

I guess I'll have to content myself with watching the You're Under Arrest TV episodes that arrived in my hands today.... I hope they're episodes I haven't seen before.

OOOOHHHHH..... I was very, VERY, *VERY* happy today. I had this wonderful new Detective Conan fanfiction in my mailbox from Krista Perry, and OOOH it was good.

*swoons happily*

I highly recommend it na no da. She posted it to the Conan Fic ML at Yahoo!Groups.

I also can't help but gloat that I got my friend positively creaming over Det. Conan now... *MWAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA* I will infect the world with Conan Mania!

Friday: 2-16-01 ~ the bewitching hour

Ah... a web-designers work is never-ever done. I've been piddling with this, tweaking that, and da'ing with much frustration. Yet, for all the work, I am having a splendidly enjoyable time.

It has been so long since I've had the opportunity to just play with graphics. It has been quite artistically therapeutic, somewhat even cathartic.

It's been gloriously dreary weather. Nice gloomy rain, and the melodic beated tempo trinkling lightly as it dances a staccato on the pavement, the roof, the brick lined sidewalks.

Listen to the rhythm of the pouring rain... it's telling me what a fool I've been...

Thursday: 2-15-01 ~ 5 o'clock high

Sometimes I wonder if this cough of mine will ever go away. Sometimes I wonder if the athletics team is coming in and bludgeoning me with baseball bats for practice as I sleep. Sometimes, I wonder what's up with the mail... I'm not a very patient sort of person. And dang-it-all, I want my mail!

*stamps her foot most impatiently*

Tuesday: 2-14-01 ~ false dawn

Valentine's Day, ah the most detested day of the year for me. For those handful of women out there, it's not a bad day. A nice guy treats them and pampers them a bit. For the rest of us we get the scum of the earth who think being nice to a lady is having a conversation with them while staring at their breasts.

Um... newsflash, it's not. -_-

This is also the anniversary of the wreck that killed a friend of mine. The weather was nasty and he had not worn his seat belt. The car in front of him stopped suddenly and they were following to close, they tried to swerve to avoid the collision and lost control. He remained in a coma until he passed away the next day.

As my memorial to him, I try to share this one piece of poetry with others who never got the chance to meet him...